Around the World….

While we have been primarily focused on the problems in the US we have been ignoring things that have been going on around the world.

Here is a list of some of the things we have been ignoring.

The fact that the giant Large Hadron Collider broke down the first time they tried to use it.

The contaminated milk scandal in China.

The huge truck bomb that went off in Islamabad.

Thabo Mbeki is resigning under pressure from the fans of Jacob Zuma. Mbeki has his problems, but Zuma is a thug.

Ehud Olmert is finally leaving office. In the short term he is being succeeded by Tzipi Livni who’s claim to fame is that she used to be Mossad agent.

NASA is going to have a press conference on the Sun. Seems that solar winds are at a 50 year low in addition to the fact that there have been few solar flares.

Truth or Fiction?

From The Sacramento Bee….

If Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger wants to issue minimum-wage checks to 200,000 state workers in less than a month, he may want to rehire any semi-retired computer programmers he terminated last week.

The massive pay cut would exhaust the state’s antiquated payroll system, which is built on a Vietnam-era computer language so outdated that many college students don’t even bother to learn it anymore.

Democratic state Controller John Chiang said Monday it would take at least six months to reconfigure the state’s payroll system to issue blanket checks at the federal minimum wage of $6.55 per hour, though Schwarzenegger insists such a change should occur this month.

I have to wonder if this is really true or not. Part of me thinks that if Mr. Chiang really wanted to obey the Governor’s order, he could find a way. Then again, I know enough about how IT works on the state level to think that maybe he is telling the truth.

An Adventure Story

From Sippican Cottage….

There’s a lot of figuring and checking. My helpers can’t be hurt, as they’re at the top of this rollercoaster looking down, but I imagine that watching the thing crush me and being sent to the workhouse for the rest of their miserable lives would be less fun than shoe-shopping and playing X-Box, so I was determined not to let the thing land on me. I’m considerate like that.

But it started to rain, less than thirty seconds after I was dumb enough to say: “Thank God it hasn’t rained.” Time to act.

I have had more excitement moving heaver weights, but I am not as smart as Sippican Cottage is. Life is always more exciting when you are dumb.

Fear Rules the Day

From the New York Times…

As Senator Christopher J. Dodd, Democrat of Connecticut and chairman of the Banking, Housing and Urban Affairs Committee, put it Friday morning on the ABC program “Good Morning America,” the congressional leaders were told “that we’re literally maybe days away from a complete meltdown of our financial system, with all the implications here at home and globally.”

Mr. Schumer added, “History was sort of hanging over it, like this was a moment.”

Read the whole thing. They sound really scared. People who are really scared do stupid things.

When Mr. Schumer described the meeting as “somber,” Mr. Dodd cut in. “Somber doesn’t begin to justify the words,” he said. “We have never heard language like this.”

“What you heard last evening,” he added, “is one of those rare moments, certainly rare in my experience here, is Democrats and Republicans deciding we need to work together quickly.”

Although Mr. Schumer, Mr. Dodd and other participants declined to repeat precisely what they were told by Mr. Bernanke and Mr. Paulson, they said the two men described the financial system as effectively bound in a knot that was being pulled tighter and tighter by the day.

US Taxpayers will soon own all the bad debt in the US

From Politico….

Congressional leaders said after meeting Thursday evening with Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson and Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke that as much as $1 trillion could be needed to avoid an imminent meltdown of the U.S. financial system.

Paulson announced plans Friday morning for a “bold approach” that will cost hundreds of billions of dollars. At a news conference at Treasury headquarters, he called for a “temporary asset relief program” to take bad mortgages off the books of the nation’s financial institutions. Congressional leaders had left Washington on Friday, but Paulson planned to confer with them over the weekend.

“We’re talking hundreds of billions,” Paulson told reporters. “This needs to be big enough to make a real difference and get to the heart of the problem.”

Models have got a bad rap

Computer models have been getting a bad rap. It is often claimed that risk mangers and CFO’s at major banks made the mistake of relying to heavily on their models. But likes so many other things that are often said, this is self serving. It makes it seem as if all these smart people were just naive little boys who didn’t know any better.

The truth of the matter is that financial executives deliberately gamed their own models. As this New York Times blog post explains….

In other words, the computer is supposed to monitor the temperature of the party and drain the punch bowl as things get hot. And just as drunken revelers may want to put the thermostat in the freezer, Wall Street executives had lots of incentives to make sure their risk systems didn’t see much risk.

“There was a willful designing of the systems to measure the risks in a certain way that would not necessarily pick up all the right risks,” said Gregg Berman, the co-head of the risk-management group at RiskMetrics, a software company spun out of JPMorgan. “They wanted to keep their capital base as stable as possible so that the limits they imposed on their trading desks and portfolio managers would be stable.”

One way they did this, Mr. Berman said, was to make sure the computer models looked at several years of trading history instead of just the last few months. The most important models calculate a measure known as Value at Risk — the amount of money you might lose in the worst plausible situation. They try to figure out what that worst case is by looking at how volatile markets have been in the past.

But since the markets were placid for several years (as mortgage bankers busily lent money to anyone with a pulse), the computers were slow to say that risk had increased as defaults started to rise.

It was like a weather forecaster in Houston last weekend talking about the onset of Hurricane Ike by giving the average wind speed for the previous month.

The first comment on this blog post claims that Goldman Sachs superior performance relative to their peers stemmed from the fact that they did not mess with their models. I don’t find this hard to believe. While I think that Goldman Sachs will not escape in the long run, computer models do have advantages. The biggest one being that they take emotion out of a lot of decisions.

They Don't Make Them Like They Use To

From the Bayou Renaissance Man…..

In that street there’s an elderly couple in a small cottage. Their neighbors on either side evacuated North, but this couple have ridden out Heaven knows how many storms together, and decided they’d stay put. After Gustav blew through, they got together with some other, equally elderly folks nearby to form a temporary ad-hoc watch group, just as we did. They include veterans from the Second World War and Korean War. (Vietnam vets and those from later conflicts are regarded with tolerant affection as “youngsters”.) So far their tally is up to seven looters and/or scumbags and/or wannabe “contractors” and/or others nailed on general suspicion, as in “Ya sure don’t look like ya belong around here, boy!” (The term “boy” is generic – anyone younger than 60 [including yours truly] qualifies, irrespective of race, creed, etc.)

(Hint to wannabe looters: “ghetto”-style gangbanger clothing isn’t normally encountered on our streets – or not for long, anyway!)

Grandpa’s leading the charge with his trusty Winchester .30-30, which dates back to 1923! It was his father’s before him. The blueing’s long since worn off, leaving only silvery metal behind, and the stock and fore-end are dinged and dented, but he’s maxed out his deer limit every year since Noah with that darn rifle. I’d hate to have him shooting at me with it! Grandma and the other ladies back up the good ol’ boys with copious amounts of coffee and soup. Grandma dishes it up hot and strong several times each night, kept company by her “old faithful” Stevens double-barrel 16ga. shotgun, also worn silver, and the victor of many contests with ducks and other feathered things.

(I asked her, just yesterday, “Why a 16ga.?” She informed me, with a gentle smile, that a 12ga. “wasn’t considered ladylike when I was growing up”, while a 20ga. wasn’t big enough for ducks. That made a 16ga. “just right for a lady.” Hey, who am I to argue?)

No End In Sight

From the Financial Times….

Were the financial crisis to end today, the costs would be painful but manageable, roughly equivalent to the cost of another year in Iraq. Unfortunately, however, the financial crisis is far from over, and it is hard to imagine how the US government is going to succeed in creating a firewall against further contagion without spending five to 10 times more than it has already, that is, an amount closer to $1,000bn to $2,000bn.